Bribery, Reciprocity, and Other Things That Actually Get You Reviews
Reviews aren’t just for humans anymore. When someone asks ChatGPT or Claude “who’s the best [your industry] in [your city],” the AI is pulling from third-party proof — Google reviews, mentions, social proof scattered across the web — to decide who’s actually trustworthy enough to recommend.
Your own website saying “we’re great” 150 times carries way less weight than fifteen strangers saying it for you.
Reviews used to be a nice-to-have. I mean. They still are. They’re really nice to have, because now they’re part of the machinery that determines whether AI search tools find and recommend you at all.
(If you’ve got an existing Showit site that isn’t optimized for that layer yet — the AI-search side of things, not just Google — that’s actually a separate, smaller project we offer now: a retrofit on just that piece, no full rebuild required. Reach out if you’re curious. For now, let’s talk reviews.)
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I always feel awkward asking a client for a review. Always. Every single time, even after doing this for years.
But here’s what I’ve started doing instead of just, you know, feeling like an awko taco: talking to myself. (So much better, right? 😅)
Seriously though, I ask myself, what am I worried about, exactly? Not that someone is going to say something — like, out loud, to my face. It’s that they might THINK something. “Hmm. A little pushy, asking for a review like that.” That’s it. That’s the whole fear. They might privately think a slightly less flattering thought about me for four seconds.
That’s just silly.
Knowing that, though, doesn’t make the feeling go away — but it does make it easier to ask anyway.
So let’s talk about actually getting reviews from your clients, plus some really specific things that have actually worked for me.
Asking isn’t taking — it’s an opening
Fact: if I genuinely loved working with someone, I want to leave them a review. Even if I was just pretty happy — not over-the-moon, just… pretty satisfied — I might still do it to be nice.
I don’t think I’m alone in this! You’re not forcing them to do anything, you’re just giving them an opening to do something nice for you after you’ve done something nice for them. (You’ve heard of the Rule of Reciprocity, right?)
That said — some people genuinely don’t want to be asked. I have a client who told me flat out that being asked for a review feels forced to her. THAT would’ve been awkward… so I never asked. Nobody owes you a review, and the ones who say they’d rather not deserve to be heard the first time.
Ask at the ACTUAL high point, not just the calendar one
Everyone (you know… everyone, the whole internet) teaches you to ask “at the end of the project.” Technically true, but what if there’s no clear end to the project? And what part of the end?
The better version: ask right when you deliver something, or right when they tell you how happy they are — not three weeks later when the feeling’s faded and you’re sending an awkward “hey, by the way” email over there.
If a client sends you an unprompted “this is amazing, thank you so much,” that’s your moment. Reply with something like:
“This made my whole day 🥹 Would you be open to pasting this exact thing into a Google review? I can send the link.”
They already said the nice thing. You’re just asking them to say it somewhere it’ll actually help you.
Make the ask easier to answer
“Would you mind leaving us a review?” is a blank page. Blank pages are intimidating, even for people who loved working with you. Give them a question instead of an empty box:
“What almost stopped you from booking?”
“What felt easier than you expected?”
“What would you tell a friend who’s on the fence?”
“What changed for you after we finished?”
Instead of writing a review from scratch, they’re just answering a question. That’s a much smaller ask than it sounds like, and the answers tend to be more specific and useful than the generic “great to work with!” reviews you’d get otherwise.
Bribery works. Not sorry about it.
(My AI told me that maybe I should feel ethically weird about this?) I actually think it’s just fine to offer incentives for reviews. Here’s how I’ve done it:
The Christmas donation. Right around the holidays — that oddball week where everyone half-thinks they should be working but also isn’t really, where time stops meaning anything and people only open their email by accident — I once sent an email during that week. I told past clients that if they left a Google review, I’d make a donation to a charity local to them. It worked! People want to do something good in that post-holiday lull, even (especially) when they’re not fully back to work mode yet. You could run this anytime, but I really enjoyed doing it right at the end of the year.
The bonus. I’m testing this with Claude Setup clients right now: if someone mentions during our 90-minute call that they had a hard time choosing which assistants they wanted for their business, I’m planning to offer to throw one in (assistants are $85 each right now; dang that sounds super bad ha) in exchange for a Google review. We’ll see how it goes, but I have high hopes. It’s a real value-add tied to something they already wanted, not a coupon after the fact for stars.
The free pilot. If you’re testing a brand-new service, trade it for a review instead of charging full price. I’m doing exactly this with Claude Setup right now (can you tell I really want some social proof on this offer?) — it gets the new offer real feedback and real reviews at the same time, while you’re still working out the kinks anyway.
Just keep asking!
I ask for a review on every single invoice. It’s right in the email body: “Have a sec? We’d love a Google review — and we’ll happily return the favour.” Nobody’s ever directly responded to that exact line, so I don’t know if it’s the best version — but it’s low-effort, it’s consistent, and it costs me nothing to keep doing.
I’m actually going to make it a little less dry and mix it up with a quirkier ask every month and see what happens. Can’t wait to see how that goes! A few I might try:
“We’re trying to grow up and look like real adults online. Help us look impressive: [link]”
““You know the thing where you tell us we’re great in a Slack message and then it just… lives there, in our phone, doing nothing? Let’s give it a job.”
“Quick one: would you rather (a) leave us a review, or (b) think about it for three more weeks and then forget. And intermittently think about it for the next 2-3 years. Be honest.”
Oh, also — sometimes you’ll ask, get an enthusiastic “on it!” and then… nothing. Even after a reminder. It happens. It’s a bit of a bummer, but people are busy, intentions are real, follow-through is hard for everyone, you included probably.
Turn it into a project
One reframe I really like: instead of asking for reviews one at a time, treat it like something you’re actively collecting:
“This year I’m collecting Google reviews so my website actually reflects the kind of work we do. Two minutes, zero pressure, eternal gratitude: [link]”
Why does it feel so different? You’re working on a project, and they’re invited to be part of it. Right?
The review swap
I’ve done this (a little bit accidentally, actually) with brand photographers I’ve worked alongside. A simple version:
“I left you a review this week because working with you changed how my clients show up online — thank you! No pressure at all, but if you’re ever up for doing the same for us, I’d be so grateful.”
Reciprocity does a lot of quiet work here. Nobody feels traded with. It just feels like two people who respect each other’s work, being decent about it.
Who do you swap with?
The trick is finding people who serve the same kind of client you do, without actually competing with you for that client. Think: who do you already refer business to, or who already refers business to you? That relationship is the easiest one to ask, because the trust is already built.
A brand photographer might ask:
- A web designer she regularly refers shoot clients to
- A business coach whose clients always need new photos before a launch
- A stylist or makeup artist she partners with for shoot days
- Us! We’d be game
A nutritionist or wellness practitioner might ask:
- A personal trainer she trades referrals with
- A therapist or counsellor serving a similar client base
- A meal delivery or local food business she recommends to clients
Same audience, different lane. You’re not competing, you’re already vouching for each other informally — this just makes it official.
None of this works without the actual work
None of this works if the relationship wasn’t good in the first place — bribery and clever scripts don’t fix a client who wasn’t happy. But if the work was good, most of the awkwardness around asking is happening entirely in your own head, not theirs. Ask at the high point. Make it easy to answer. Mix in a little thank-you when it feels right. And if someone tells you directly that asking feels forced to them, believe them and move on.
Want the super quirky version of this? Bingo cards, slightly chaotic checkboxes, the whole bit — I wrote that one too.
If you want help building a system around this instead of figuring it out script by script, that’s exactly the kind of thing we sort out in a Marketing Sprint.
Questions I get a lot:
When’s the best time to ask a client for a review?
Right at the high point — when you deliver something, when something launches, or right after they send you an unprompted “thank you so much” message. Asking at a calendar milestone (like “the end of the project”) is fine too, but the emotional high point converts far better than a generic timeline.
Is it okay to offer something in exchange for a review?
A small thank-you gift — a bonus add-on, a discount on future work, a donation in their name — is different from paying for stars. As long as you’re not asking them to say something untrue, a thoughtful incentive is a nice gesture, not a manipulation.
What if a client doesn’t respond to a review request?
It happens, and it’s usually not personal. A gentle one-time follow-up is reasonable; repeated reminders start to feel like pressure. If someone tells you directly that being asked feels uncomfortable, respect that and don’t ask again.
How do I make asking for a review feel less awkward?
Reframe what you’re actually afraid of. Most of the discomfort isn’t about anything someone would say to you — it’s the fear of a brief, private, unflattering thought. Naming that fear honestly tends to shrink it.
Liked this? I send a short email every couple of weeks — a real story plus one useful thing about your website or marketing. Never longer than your coffee.
Doreen Vanderhart is the founder of Knap Creative, a boutique design and marketing studio for established, service-based businesses. She still feels weird every single time she asks for a review, and has made peace with doing it anyway.
For the full playbook on collecting and displaying testimonials strategically, [→ Testimonial Strategies That Work: A Practical Guide]
Reviews are also one of the biggest trust signals for AI search — here’s what that means for you. [→ How to Find Out What AI Says About Your Business]
From reviews to referrals — the client experience is what connects them. [→ How to Get More Client Referrals (Without Asking All the Time)]
